A Rule of Life • The Six Forces Of Unintentional Formation • The Three Divine Means Of Grace • Crafting A Rule Of Life • Priorities to Consider When Crafting a Rule of Life
Remember flipping through cable channels late at night? You weren’t looking for anything in particular—just something to pass the time. Before you knew it, hours had slipped by watching reruns, reality shows, or infomercials you didn’t even care about. That’s the power of media: it’s designed to keep you passive, distracted, and consuming. You didn’t mean to waste time—you just drifted. That’s exactly how unintentional spiritual formation works—what John Mark Comer refers to as the six forces of unintentional formation. If we don’t take hold of the remote—if we don’t intentionally choose what shapes us—something else will. And like cable TV, the world is full of voices competing for our attention, not our transformation. But when we partner with God through the three divine means of grace—the Bible, the Holy Spirit, and the Church—we stop channel surfing through life. We become intentional about who we’re becoming. And suddenly, those same six forces around us? They’re no longer distractions. They’re invitations to deep, lasting transformation.
Unintentional Drift: Without realizing it, we absorb cultural lies and, shaped by past pain and trauma, begin to accept distorted, ungodly beliefs about God, others, and life: “You are what you do,” “You have to earn love,” “God is silent,” or “You’re not enough.” These stories shape our identity, behavior, and sense of worth.
Intentional Formation: Through Scripture, the Spirit and the Body of Christ, these false narratives are challenged and replaced with the true story of the gospel. We begin to see ourselves as beloved, forgiven, called, and sent.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Replaces lies with the true narrative of God’s love and redemption.
Holy Spirit: Applies truth to our hearts in personal, transformative ways.
Church: Proclaims, teaches, and models the gospel story in community.
Result: We live from a secure identity in Christ, walking in truth, freedom, and peace—not fear or performance.
Unintentional Drift: Our daily rhythms often default to distraction, digital addiction, self-medication, busyness and self-reliance—shaping us into anxious, isolated, or performance-driven people.
Intentional Formation: We adopt intentional practices—like silence, solitude, Sabbath, prayer, Biblical meditation, and hospitality—that train our desires and align our lives with Christ.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Offers patterns and models for holy rhythms of life.
Holy Spirit: Changes our appetites and empowers sustainable habits.
Church: Provides structure, encouragement, rhythm and accountability for consistent practice.
Result: Habits become means of intimacy and transformation, not compulsion. We are formed through discipline and delight into the image of Christ.
Unintentional Drift: We mirror the people around us—whether coworkers, influencers, or peers—often leading to complacency, compromise (we normalize sin), or comparison.
Intentional Formation: We seek Christ-centered relationships marked by authenticity, encouragement, correction, and grace. These become sharpening friendships that nurture growth.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Calls us to sacrificial love, accountability, and mutual discipleship.
Holy Spirit: Cultivates humility, love, and unity in community.
Church: Becomes a spiritual family where we are known, challenged, and loved.
Result: Relationships become sanctifying spaces—iron sharpening iron—not arenas of peer pressure or superficiality.
Unintentional Drift: We are unconsciously shaped by noisy, digital, consumer-driven spaces that train us for distraction and numb our spiritual sensitivity.
Intentional Formation: We curate physical and digital spaces to be sacred—marked by stillness, simplicity, beauty, and space for encounter with God.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Offers a vision for holy, undistracted, purposeful living.
Holy Spirit: Makes ordinary spaces sacred by His presence.
Church: Models an alternative kingdom culture through worship, simplicity, and shared practices.
Result: Our environments form us toward God, not away. Spaces become tools for attentiveness to God and alignment with His priorities, not escape.
5. Experiences We Have > Interpreted With God's Perspective and Through God's Redemption
Unintentional Drift: Pain can harden us or distort our view of God; success can inflate pride or become an idol if left unprocessed.
Intentional Formation: With God, we learn to process joy and suffering alike through reflection, gratitude, and redemptive insight. We meet Jesus in every experience.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Gives language and meaning to suffering and joy, showing God's redemptive hand.
Holy Spirit: Brings comfort, healing, and interpretive clarity in all seasons.
Church: Walks with us in celebration and lament, helping us stay grounded in Christ.
Result: Experiences become catalysts for transformation, not random or wasted moments. We are formed, not fractured, by life.
Unintentional Drift: Time multiplies whatever we consistently do—good or bad. Without intention, it deepens unhealthy patterns, spiritual stagnation and disconnection. Time compounds worldliness.
Intentional Formation: Through steady presence with Jesus—over weeks, years, and decades—time compounds faithfulness, self-control/self-discipline, wisdom, and fruitfulness.
Means of Grace:
Bible: Teaches us to number our days and invest them wisely.
Holy Spirit: Works patiently and deeply, forming Christ in us over time.
Church: Offers a lifelong context for growth, stability, and transformation.
Result: Formation becomes a long obedience in the same direction—rooted, fruitful, and mature.
Without even realizing it, we are always being shaped. But through intentional partnership with God’s Word, God’s Spirit, and God’s People, the very forces that once conformed us to the world now become tools God uses to conform us to Christ.
Intentionality + The Means of Grace = Transformation
Instead of drifting through life, we become disciples—people who choose to be with Jesus, become like Jesus, and do what He did. This is holistic formation. This is the way of Jesus.