Forgiveness
What It Is, What It Is Not, and How to Walk in It
(English & Español)
Raimer Rojas
Inner Healing • Inner Healing Issues
Forgiveness Prayer • Bible Stories on Forgiveness DBS Set • Corrie Ten Boom & Forgiveness
(English & Español)
Raimer Rojas
Inner Healing • Inner Healing Issues
Forgiveness Prayer • Bible Stories on Forgiveness DBS Set • Corrie Ten Boom & Forgiveness
PDF: Forgiveness Handout (double-sided)
Forgiveness is one of the clearest marks of life in Christ, yet it is one of the hardest acts of obedience. This guide is meant to help you see forgiveness clearly, choose it sincerely, and keep walking in it when old feelings try to return.
Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling ‒ At its core, forgiveness is an act of the will. You do not wait until your emotions calm down before you obey God. You choose forgiveness first, and over time the heart can begin to follow.
Forgiveness is releasing the offender into God's hands ‒ It means you let the person off your hook, not because the wrong was small, but because God is the righteous Judge and you are trusting Him to deal with it rightly.
Forgiveness is choosing not to hold the offense against someone ‒ You are no longer keeping score, replaying the debt, or storing the offense for future use. You release the debt instead of preserving it as a weapon.
Forgiveness is for your freedom, even if the other person never changes ‒ Your obedience in forgiveness is first about your relationship with God. The other person may remain unchanged, but you no longer have to remain chained.
Forgiveness does not erase pain, but it breaks bondage ‒ You may still feel grief, anger, or disappointment. Those feelings do not automatically mean you have not forgiven. They simply mean the wound still needs healing.
Forgiveness can begin in a moment and unfold as a process ‒ There is often a clear point of decision, but there may also be a longer journey of healing, renewing your mind, and reaffirming your choice when pain resurfaces.
Forgiveness is costly ‒ Every real offense creates loss. Forgiveness means you stop demanding personal repayment and choose to carry the cost with God instead of spreading the pain through bitterness.
KEY TRUTH: Forgiveness is not saying, "It did not matter." It is saying, "It mattered, but I am releasing this person to God and refusing to stay bound to the offense."
Forgiveness is not forgetting ‒ You may still remember what happened. Forgiveness means you do not rehearse the offense, nurse it, or use it against the person later.
Forgiveness is not calling evil good ‒ It does not excuse sin, minimize damage, or pretend everything was fine. In fact, real forgiveness takes the wrong seriously enough to release it honestly to God.
Forgiveness is not the same as reconciliation ‒ Forgiveness can be offered by one person. Reconciliation requires repentance, truth, rebuilding, and mutual participation.
Forgiveness is not automatic trust ‒ A forgiven person may still need to rebuild credibility over time. Wisdom and forgiveness are meant to walk together.
Forgiveness is not removing all consequences ‒ A person may still face discipline, boundaries, legal consequences, or loss of access. Forgiveness does not cancel the need for truth or accountability.
Forgiveness is not passively allowing further harm ‒ You can forgive and still protect yourself, seek help, report abuse, or establish strong boundaries.
Forgiveness is not the denial of justice ‒ To forgive is not to stop caring about justice. It is to stop trying to be the final judge yourself and to entrust justice to God.
REMEMBER: You can forgive and still say, "That was wrong. That hurt. That needs to stop. And I am putting it in God's hands."
Why Followers of Jesus must Forgive
Because God commands it ‒ Forgiveness is not presented in Scripture as an optional extra for mature believers. It is part of the normal obedience of a disciple.
Because you have been forgiven much ‒ The cross humbles us. We do not forgive from superiority, but from gratitude. We release others as people who ourselves live by mercy.
Because Jesus modeled it in suffering ‒ Jesus forgave while being falsely accused, tortured, and crucified. He did not wait for an apology before releasing His enemies to the Father.
Because unforgiveness gives bitterness a place to grow ‒ When bitterness is fed, it spreads. It clouds judgment, poisons prayer, damages relationships, and weakens spiritual life.
Because forgiveness keeps your heart open to God ‒ A hard heart toward people often becomes a hard heart toward God. Forgiveness protects tenderness, humility, and peace.
Because forgiveness frees you for love and ministry ‒ Unforgiveness drains emotional and spiritual energy. Forgiveness restores clarity, peace, and availability to do the good works God has called you to do.
KEY TRUTH: The strongest motive for forgiving others is not that they deserve it, but that in Christ God has shown mercy to you.
How to Walk in Forgiveness after you Forgive
Acknowledge the hurt honestly before God ‒ You cannot heal what you refuse to name. Bring the pain, anger, confusion, and grief into the light of God's presence.
Reaffirm your choice when feelings return ‒ Old emotions may rise again. Do not panic. Simply stand again in your decision and tell the Lord that you still choose forgiveness.
Refuse to rehearse the offense ‒ Thoughts become grooves. Each time you stop replaying the wound and return your mind to truth, you weaken bitterness and strengthen peace.
Do not use the offense as a future weapon ‒ If you have forgiven, do not keep pulling the offense out to shame, control, or punish the person later.
Invite God to heal what forgiveness alone does not heal ‒ Forgiveness releases the debt. God heals the wound. Ask Him to restore what was damaged in your heart.
Pray blessing, not revenge ‒ At least once sincerely place the person before the Lord and ask Him to deal with them in truth, mercy, and justice.
Set wise boundaries where needed ‒ Walking in forgiveness does not mean returning to the same unsafe pattern. Let love and wisdom work together.
Walk by the Spirit ‒ Sustained forgiveness is not maintained by grit alone. The Holy Spirit helps you keep your heart aligned with what you have chosen before God.
KEY TRUTH: Forgiveness is a choice you make once—and a freedom you choose again and again.
Lord Jesus, I choose to forgive. I release this person and this offense into Your hands. I give up my right to revenge. Cleanse my heart from bitterness, heal what was wounded in me, and teach me to walk in the freedom, wisdom, and mercy You have shown me. Amen.
PDF: Forgiveness Scripture Handout (single-sided)
Teachings of Jesus (Foundational)
“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors… For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others… neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” ‒ Matthew 6:12, 14–15
“Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” ‒ Matthew 18:21–22
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, 'Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”' ‒ Matthew 5:43–44
“And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” ‒ Mark 11:25
“Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful. Judge not, and you will not be judged… forgive, and you will be forgiven.” ‒ Luke 6:36–37
The Example of Jesus
“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” ‒ Luke 23:34
Apostolic Teaching (How Believers Live This Out)
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger… be put away from you… Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” ‒ Ephesians 4:31–32
“Put on then… compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another… forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” ‒ Colossians 3:12–13
“Repay no one evil for evil… Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’” ‒ Romans 12:17–19
“Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.” 1 Peter 3:9
“Strive for peace with everyone… See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springs up and causes trouble.” ‒ Hebrews 12:14–15
The Gospel Foundation (Why Forgiveness Matters)
“Repent and be baptized… in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins.” ‒ Acts 2:38
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” ‒ 1 John 1:9
Identity & Freedom Connection
“Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.” ‒ Ephesians 4:26–27