When Comparison Enters the Heart

A pastor opens his social media and sees a post from a nearby church. The room is full. The lights and musicians look excellent. The message is polished, refined, and very well presented. It speaks of church growth, record attendance, and new projects. Everything seems to be moving forward with momentum.

At first, the pastor rejoices. But then he feels something uneasy inside. He begins to wonder whether his own ministry is falling behind. He looks at his church, which is smaller and less impressive, and begins to question whether he is truly being effective.

Maybe, he begins to think, he needs to change the way he does ministry. Maybe he feels the pressure to copy the model that seems to be producing results. But before we assume that all visible growth is true fruit, we need to reflect more deeply: Is that model forming disciples in the way of Jesus?

This is where the Word of God confronts us with clarity: “But the Lord said to Samuel, 'Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.'”  — 1 Samuel 16:7.  Just as Samuel had to learn not to be led by what was visible when choosing the king, we also must learn to discern beyond what appears successful.

Our Primary Calling 

Our work as leaders of Christ is to form disciples in the way and style of Jesus. That is our primary calling. We are not called to follow distorted discipleship models, imitate them, or promote them. Our calling is to form disciples in His way.

Not everything that shines is gold. Not everything that seems to produce quick results comes from God. Something may look effective or impressive on the outside, but if it is not rooted in the biblical way of Jesus, we should not assume it comes from the Spirit. True fruit is tested over time. Jesus Himself reminded us: “By their fruit you will recognize them...”  - Matthew 7:16a NIV.  Not by appearance. Not by size. Not by immediate impact. But by the fruit that remains.

The Fruit Jesus Seeks

Jesus never called us to produce results at any cost. He called us to make disciples and to teach them to obey everything He commanded. He also called us to remain in Him, because only in Him do we bear true fruit. “Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”  — John 15:4-5.  That is why the fruit we seek is not merely activity. It is not merely numerical growth or visible influence. We are seeking fruit that looks like Jesus. That fruit includes love, obedience, and humility. It also includes holiness, maturity, and a life that reproduces in others.

Sometimes spiritual leaders confuse what is good and attractive with the best God has for His people. But something can look useful, modern, or exciting and still fail to form people deeply in the way of Jesus. God’s best always leads us to Christ, forms His character in us, and produces fruit that remains.

Apparent fruit often comes from a hurried process. The time of formation is reduced in order to produce results that impress. People can be shaped by recent church trends that are praised in certain Christian circles because they seem attractive, modern, or effective. These may include worship styles focused on spectacle, simplified messages designed to please people, or strategies copied from other churches simply because they are popular. But these things do not necessarily form people through presence, shared community, and the models of a life that looks like Jesus.

Because of this, the fruit can become mixed. There may be good things, bad things, and also neutral things. Some practices, activities, or approaches are not wrong in themselves, but they also do not truly contribute to forming people into the image of Christ. Some neutral things can even end up having a negative effect over time, not because they are wrong by nature, but because they consume time, energy, and focus. They distract from what truly matters and from what produces deep transformation.

There can be activity, sincere emotion, and some positive results. But if the formation is not rooted in the way of Jesus, that fruit may look alive on the outside without having the depth needed to remain faithful in hard times. Jesus spoke about this in the parable of the sower (Matthew 13). Some seeds spring up quickly, but they have no root. When trials come, they wither.

True fruit takes time. Forming people like Jesus takes time. Jesus did not form His disciples only through teaching from a distance like in large crowds; He walked closely with them. He corrected them and restored them. He showed them with His own life how to live. Jesus is the perfect model, and becoming like Him is the goal of discipleship. That is why true discipleship forms people through presence, support, and example. It produces love, obedience, and humility. It produces fruit that endures even in hard times.

Free from Comparison

As leaders, we are not called to constantly compare ourselves to other leaders. We should not measure our churches by other ministry models. Some models seem to grow faster or draw more attention. But if those models are not promoting the full call of God, we should not measure ourselves by them. Our standard is not fame. It is not speed. It is not the appearance of success. Our standard is faithfulness to Jesus.

The way of Jesus often seems slower, but it forms deeper roots. It does not hurry the process in order to impress. It forms steady people, people who remain dependent on the Father when hard times come.

We must also remember something important: we do not see everything God sees. We see appearance, but He sees the root. He also sees true fruit and the heart. Because of this, we can celebrate what truly comes from God without confusing appearance with true fruit.

Responsibility Without Control

As leaders, we are not in charge of how people respond, but we are responsible to discern what obstacles are keeping them from growing and to guide them faithfully toward the way of Jesus. Part of our calling is to lovingly discern where there are wounds, confusion, or immaturity. We must also recognize patterns that are blocking growth. We are not responsible for the decisions others make in their walk with God, but we are responsible to call them with clarity, love, and faithfulness to the life Jesus offers.

Our calling is not to control their responses. It is to sow and water faithfully, walking with them and modeling the way of Jesus. In the end, we trust that only God can produce true growth. As Paul wrote: “ I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow.”  —  1 Corinthians 3:6 NIV. 

Not Lowering the Cost of Discipleship

If we could see from heaven’s perspective, we might notice two extremes in leadership. Some leaders are so distant that they barely accompany their people. They trust that their words alone will produce change, pointing out the way from far away without walking with people. Others, however, do too much for their people. They carry what does not belong to them. They comfort when they should confront, and they soften situations where direct truth is needed. Instead of forming responsible disciples, they end up supporting lives that never learn to walk on their own.

There is also another danger: constantly feeding people with truth without calling them to live it. We teach, but we do not expect obedience. We speak, but we do not form character. People hear the Word, but they do not practice it.

From heaven’s perspective, we might imagine one pastor carrying his people on his shoulders, trying to take them to their spiritual destination by his own strength. We might imagine another pastor standing at a far distance, pointing toward heaven without truly entering into their process of transformation. Neither of these extremes reflects the heart of Jesus.

We do not make the path easier by diluting the message. We also do not carry what each person must carry before God. We are not called to lower the cost of discipleship. We are called to walk with people in love as they learn to follow Jesus with their whole being. Jesus was clear: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.”  — Luke 9:23 NIV. 

Our calling is to form disciples in purity. We do this with grace and truth. We also do it with patience and clarity. We do it with love and responsibility. This kind of discipleship does not only inform people. It also calls them to mature, obey, and heal. It helps them grow and live like Jesus. It also helps them reproduce the life of Christ in others. All of this requires true models of life: leaders who live what they teach and walk the way of Jesus first.

The Fruit That Remains

When we see church models that are large or successful, we should not compare ourselves or be carried away by appearances. We can look with discernment and celebrate what truly comes from God, but without confusing visible growth with true fruit. Jesus does not ask us to impress. He asks us to be faithful.

True fruit is not about impressive ministries, but about disciples who look more and more like Jesus. This calling remains beautiful and holy: forming people who love like Jesus, obey like Jesus, and live to reflect Him in the world.

There is no higher path for Christian leadership than walking with Jesus, forming others in His way of life, and trusting that He will grow the fruit that remains. That is the fruit that blesses the disciple who walks with Jesus. And that is the fruit that strengthens the church and honors and glorifies God.